Strategies to communicate & connect with you non-speaking child
Guest Speaker
Crestina Yaiva is a mother of twins. She and her husband have one child who has been diagnosed with autism, and struggles with communication. She shares her story, and how she learned to overcome obstacles of communicating with her non-speaking child.
What were Crestina’s first thoughts and feelings when she learned her son was autistic?
Around three years old Crestina noticed that Franco had some speech delays, and wouldn’t talk as much as his brother Vincent. When he was officially diagnosed around the age of four, Crestina felt somewhat relieved to have a place to start understanding her child better. However, she was also very overwhelmed by all the information and such that was being given to her. The first thing she did was join every Facebook group she could find from local to national. Her focus/goal was to learn how to better handle her son’s diagnosis.
After some research, what did Crestina do to solidify her next moves?
Once Franco completed testing, he was set up with a developmental pediatrician. Crestina was given a research book to help guide her on this new journey with her child. Crestina jumped into action setting Franco up with speech therapy, occupational therapy, and any other type of therapy that would aid in her son’s development. From there, she searched the internet for any reading material to further her knowledge. There were a couple books that proved to be very resourceful to her and her husband. Crestina found the book The Reason I Jump by Naoki Higashida to be her favorite. It truly helped her understand some of her son’s behavior, such as the random breakdowns and sensory overloads her son went through without her knowing the cause. She realized in her son’s mind time is not linear, and that changed her perspective for the better. As for her husband, the book Not My Boy by Kelly Simmons caused him to find a way to better cope with his son’s diagnosis and build a stronger relationship with him.
What are some learning points that helped Crestina to connect more with her child from a non-speaking perspective?
As a mother Crestina has the natural ability to anticipate her children’s wants and needs before they could even try to tell her. Crestina had to learn to take a step back, and create more opportunities for her son’s to find ways to express themselves without her doing it for them. This would help them to expand their communication skills.
What are some examples of how Crestina created opportunities for her children to learn to communicate on their own?
Crestina did her best to keep everything in sight, but out of reach. This included anything from toys to snacks. Her husband even built shelves to help as well. Through trial and error they began to find ways for their children to use different methods of body language and such to communicate their needs.
What is the advice Crestina would give to other parents with non-speaking children?
The biggest thing is to have patience. Children will not always communicate the way we may expect them too. Remaining open, receptive, and acknowledging of your child’s style of communication you can provide a sense of comfort and reassurance they will need.
Recap:
Seek the guidance and aid of a developmental pediatrician.
Understand your child’s perspective, and find ways to connect
Anticipate behaviors and communication, but find ways to create learning opportunities for your child to communicate.
Resources:
Recommended articles related to non-verbal communication
https://www.thefca.co.uk/fostering-autistic-children/communicating-with-a-nonverbal-child/
https://www.friendshipcircle.org/blog/2013/04/16/23-ways-to-communicate-with-a-non-verbal-child/
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