This skill could be contributing to your child's impulse control
Special Guest: Abigail Wool-Biringer.
Abigail is an occupational therapist and specialist in executive functioning skills as they relate to ASD, ADHD and more.
Background:
Even with structure and support your child still may be exhibiting behaviors that may be tied to executive functioning development.
What is executive Functioning?
Executive functioning skills are a set of cognitive skills that basically function as the boss of the rest of the brain. They help plan, organize and delegate. They inhibit impulsivity and emotional responses. They keep track of time and problem solve when things are not going well. They allow us to learn from past mistakes and adjust behavior for the future.
What might executive functioning difficulties look like?
They show up in so many ways. Difficulty starting a task that is boring, repetitive or too challenging - so like homework, chores, getting off of something super fun like electronics and into a bedtime routine. They also might show up in ways like difficulty engaging at school, being flexible with the unexpected changes in routine, staying regulated when upset or frustrated, and so many more ways.
If I’m a parent what would be some signs?
The signs are all behavioral. Your child is DOING something that is causing difficulties at home, school, or the community. You can look to executive functioning to see if that could be a potential cause.
If a parent suspects their child is having executive functioning difficulties what should they do?
The first change should be to change your mindset. Dr. Ross Greene calls this a lens change. When you view your child as struggling with the EF skills, you can soften your approach. You can understand that these are skill deficits and not something that they are willfully doing in order to make parents or school staff life hard. So the first step is recognition. The next step is to problem solve and figure out what is hard for them and how can you help support them while they build those skills.
What is a tool or activity/s that can promote executive functioning skills?
Allowing your child to TRY when it comes to things like impulse control, flexibility, time management, organization, planning and more. Give them opportunities to problem solve and figure out what works for them while at the same time not allowing them to get so frustrated and overwhelmed that they never want to do it again if they experience failure. These skills take 20+ years to develop!
Recap
Executive Functioning is:
A group of cognitive skills that are not fully developed until after age 20 but include all of the “boss” functions of the brain like planning, organizing, managing time, finishing a task and putting off more preferred activities while maintaining emotional regulation
Signs of Executive Functioning difficulties could look like:
Difficulty with any daily task or routine
Big emotional responses to what may seem to others to be less of a big deal
Difficulty shifting perspective or plan when something is not going as expected
Academic, Home, or Community struggles that show up in a pattern of “behaviors”
If you think your child may have executive functioning difficulties you can: (today’s tool)
Shift your perspective to understand that they are struggling with a skill set first and not being purposefully bad
Seek help and resources to guide your child to strengthen the EF skills that they need help with
How can they reach you for more questions?
Kids Empowered 4 Life
https://kidsempowered4life.com/
Abigail currently has an online program about executive functioning skills. She also does one on one assessment and coaching/sessions, group coaching for teens online, parent coaching and is developing a series of workshops for parents.
She has created a FB support group
- Arizona + ADHD parent support.
She is a tireless advocate for problem solving WITH your child and moving away from rewards and punishments b/c those do not build skills.
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